The unborn beginning

And so she said, " hati kena kental". Got to have the guts.

To start a conversation, it ain't easy.

Internet rules it all.

And so I said to myself "got to  do it girl. You can be his friend"

I did say hey.

The internet is a good medium to start something.

It turns out pretty good but then, the second conversation wasn't that great.

It was,

Awkwardly awkward.

It is just suck.

To wait behind this portable stone, waiting for another person behind another portable stone

To give feedbacks.

It is just suck,

To think that what if, he thinks I'm weird.

It is just suck

To think that, what if, I'm nowhere near his league or I am nowhere his league.

It is even sucker

to let him run my mind to think that I was no good.

And so I pass by him a couple of times,

In real life.

It felt like I've been crumpled and folded and hit continuously

I felt blood rushing to my vein on my face until I started to feel the heat

The heat of shame.

Shouldn't have said HI at first place,

Shouldn't have talked at first place

Shouldn't have known him at the first place

Should have walked away when I knew I would have a little crush on him.

It felt such a big feeling, the crush

But no it was not.

The thing that makes it such a big deal is that,

He chose  to discriminate me and rather talked to my friends whom he did not know when I am around. In a way it does hurt yet in another way around, I'm blessed.

I choose the people I want to have in my life. Whether you stay or you  go.